Some people will not date a person with kids....even if they have kids themselves....i am not one of those people....but i can surely understand why someone would feel this way.....due to the bd/bm drama people choose not to deal with it at all....but what do you do when kids are apart of the equation? some people instantly jump into roles where they are playing stepmother or father.....allot of women have this idea if I'm dating the man I'm dating the kids too....now to me that isn't true and imma tell you why.
Dating a person with kids doesn't make you anything to those kids at all.....even if they are missing a father or mother figure...entering into a child's life is not to just play a "role".......i am currently in a relationship with a guy who has two children i have zero.....and i would say from day one he has made it very clear that he is a father and a proud one....and that his kids come first....so on weekends when he had his kids we didn't hang out......he didn't just bring his kids around like hey this my girlfriend, and these are my kids y'all make it happen.....he has a son whom i adore he is my little helper and he comes around allot....now his daughter not so much....and i respect that because a man shouldn't parade women around his daughter in my opinion...now as this relationship has progressed the kids are around more....but we don't have this big family thing where we all hang out all the time
I was having a talk with one of my old coworkers and she had expressed to me how she found it weird that I'm not an active role in his kids life......she feels that anytime she is dating and the relationship is serious she has to know if the guy is a right fit, not only for her but for her kids too.....and i totally understand her point....but here is mine i don't have kids and dating a person with kids does not make me a mother.....and I'm sure the "mother" word is a over statement but i don't feel the need to have these big family outings.....or to make myself a role in their life.....I'm totally ok with seeing them every once in a while...... now his daughter yeah i wanna spoil her and "hang out".....but in due time.
now for those of you guys who have dated someone with kids or have had man around your kids.....what role did they play..... was it a father figure? now what happens when the relationship goes sour and y'all break it off? how do you explain that to your kids? now im sure the kids will get over the breakup faster then you.....but do you bring your next boyfriend around too....whats your time frame before you bring your relationship into your family life...feel free to share your thoughts!
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