I Aint Saying She a Gold Digger! :)

i feel like I'm always blogging about other folks life....but mine is so boring lmao.....

its this chick I'm very cool with she always got some dude spending money on her ass....so i like to hear her little stories lol......so she was telling me how she met this guy and he owns his own business..... actually i know exactly who he is lol.....KC is too small so i wont be sharing any of his info......so she is really feeling him..... he has great convo he takes her on dates y'all know all the cute shit.....ok so they been talking for a month and he invites her over his house this weekend to watch the fight.....he gives her the address.....she telling me she was driving up and down the a major street and couldn't find his house.....so she calls him and was like im lost where do you stay exactly....she says he is like ill come outside so you can see me....ok she pulls up and realizes his business and house share the same address....y'all she is is instantly turned off....she didn't want to be rude so she stays to watch the fight

now she says she gets into his apartment and its really nice....as she got settled she forgot she was even upstairs from a shop.....now she says this guy has no kids owns his own business and has a degree....but she cant get with the fact his apartment is over his business......she thinks this means he is not handling his money and his business isn't successful....smh y'all I'm like hol up hol up hol up hol up hol the fuck up.....

Ok so this guy so far is a catch i see no reason to cute him off....i think he is smart living above his shop saves hella money...and as she stated its set up very nice.....what do us real women have to do to find someone like this....shit if she don't want him i know a few that would love all over him and treat him like a King.....now they have only known each other a month but he hasn't done anything crazy he still in good graces....give the guy a chance....what do y'all think?

I Get Out!!!!

I get out, I get out of all your boxes
I get out, you can't hold me in these chains
I'll get out
Father free me from this bondage
Knowin' my condition
Is the reason I must change

I was having a very convo with one of my home girls.....this particular person opinion/advice i listen too....again she is not that older than me....but she is older so in my opinion she a little wiser....anyway she noticed a pair of earrings in my ear...and she stated that my whole style is changing....now today I'm standing in my bedroom and i show my bf my hair.....i just got it braided....he made the statement where is Tiffany? Which have inspired this blog.....


I have gone my whole life being this "ghetto girl" allot of people may have their own opinion of who i am......when i do things i can assure its by choice.....imma break somethings down for all my ladies reading....people fear the unknown...meaning when someone cant put you in a box....you either become 1. a prototype or 2. Ridiculed....people have to be able to label you....and i just chose not to be put in a box I'm claustrophobic (self diagnosed lol).....but for real i cant stand to feel closed in.....i love to learn and educate myself...and sometimes after reading our watching something my opinion about things can change....not to mean I'm easily persuaded....i decided to go natural not because its a fad but because i literally woke up one day and said no more perms.....i didn't realize so many people were natural until now.....so don't think I'm just on the bandwagon...

let me just get to the point.....i refuse to be put in a box...or feel i have to be a certain way just because I'm "black".....i love life i love people...i love learning about cultures other than my own.....in my opinion God did not create race...he created Man Kind....like my first point people need to put you in a box in order to justify actions...I'm not tryna get all sista soldier on yah....i have soooo much i can say on this topic but i want y'all to listen to my girl Lauryn Hill song "I Get Out"...she sums up all my thoughts on this joint



if you smoke crack guess what no more WELFARE!

What do y'all think about the government making folks take drug test for assistants? I think its damn good.....the only thing I'm worried about is the ones that fail the test....when they lose their EBT and section 8....will they start robing folks for money?.....people out here getting $999.99 in stamps....living in four bedroom houses....all utilities paid by whom you ask? The mf'ing government.....and how and the hell does the government get this money? taxes paid by whom people that work.....yes I'm hating because I'm tired of standing in line at walmart with enough to eat lunch at work for the next two weeks....while the lady in front of me got two carts full of zooms zooms and wham whams.....now look I'm not talking about the folks who need it.....I'm not talking about the folks that need a hand up....I'm talking about the ones needing a hand out....now if someone is giving you money and taking care of you....then you are damn fucking right you gotta do what they ask you to do....if not then get a job.

people get all bent out a shape when folks say something about people getting government assistants....i been on section 8 and i haven't had a kid in my life....they paid a whole $45 of my $395 rent and i was unemployed.....but i was grateful and i got my ass a job.....that brings me to my next point....the ones that work low paying jobs on purpose so they don't lose section 8.....what part of the game is that? laaaaaaawd help these chicken heads. or the ones that work long enough to get a income tax check at the end of the year...

if your not on drugs.....if your needing a hand up and not looking for a hand out.....you shouldn't be offended...i would love to hear from people who think doing the drug test is bad and why.....i have a job which stands for Just Over Broke.....I'm a pay check away from repo and eviction.....so i definitely need to improve my savings.....but i work and i work hard.....I'm apart of America too but it has been made very clear unless i have a few kids.....the government ain't paying for shit....matter of fact they gone say i owe some taxes lol....anyway y'all better start tryna get clean out here uncle Sam said he tired of y'all shit.

who that is that? just my baby daddy!

Some people will not date a person with kids....even if they have kids themselves....i am not one of those people....but i can surely understand why someone would feel this way.....due to the bd/bm drama people choose not to deal with it at all....but what do you do when kids are apart of the equation? some people instantly jump into roles where they are playing stepmother or father.....allot of women have this idea if I'm dating the man I'm dating the kids too....now to me that isn't true and imma tell you why.

Dating a person with kids doesn't make you anything to those kids at all.....even if they are missing a father or mother figure...entering into a child's life is not to just play a "role".......i am currently in a relationship with a guy who has two children i have zero.....and i would say from day one he has made it very clear that he is a father and a proud one....and that his kids come first....so on weekends when he had his kids we didn't hang out......he didn't just bring his kids around like hey this my girlfriend, and these are my kids y'all make it happen.....he has a son whom i adore he is my little helper and he comes around allot....now his daughter not so much....and i respect that because a man shouldn't parade women around his daughter in my opinion...now as this relationship has progressed the kids are around more....but we don't have this big family thing where we all hang out all the time

I was having a talk with one of my old coworkers and she had expressed to me how she found it weird that I'm not an active role in his kids life......she feels that anytime she is dating and the relationship is serious she has to know if the guy is a right fit, not only for her but for her kids too.....and i totally understand her point....but here is mine i don't have kids and dating a person with kids does not make me a mother.....and I'm sure the "mother" word is a over statement but i don't feel the need to have these big family outings.....or to make myself a role in their life.....I'm totally ok with seeing them every once in a while...... now his daughter yeah i wanna spoil her and "hang out".....but in due time.

now for those of you guys who have dated someone with kids or have had man around your kids.....what role did they play..... was it a father figure? now what happens when the relationship goes sour and y'all break it off? how do you explain that to your kids? now im sure the kids will get over the breakup faster then you.....but do you bring your next boyfriend around too....whats your time frame before you bring your relationship into your family life...feel free to share your thoughts!

this fall child im geeked!!!!

ok its almost fall and I'm excited this is not my fave season....however I'm excited about all the upcoming events....I'm not doing much but chances are we will be having a ball......I'm into the blazers ( omg I'm watching a movie and they just totally messed up the time line).....its a coral colored blazer this bad boy is $42 i just cant make myself buy it....i know the goodwill has some so yea that's where I'm headed.

also i plan on wearing makeup...now i know how to put on eyeshadow and liner...i don't have a clue on how to do anything else...so imma be checking out some YouTube vids for pointers and of course sharing them with my ladies....my changes aren't gonna be just for looks....I've already changed and i love it i hope my blog shows my growth in the future....

the heart of a single married woman

I meet a lot of older women that are wise in age as well as mind.....even if they are just a few years older they always offer wisdom to me.....i had a chance to speak with a lady.....i had just got done crying and she asked what was wrong....so i told her and from there we bonded and every time i see her we catch up....she has been married for three years and with her husband 15 years before they were married so a total of 18yrs.......now this woman of course has went thru hell and back in this relationship.....she was telling me a story of when she worked at Burger King as a Manager and her then boyfriend was sleeping with one of the cashiers......and she had no idea until one day the girl was mad at him and told her everything.....she said she beat the breaks off that girl and was arrested and lost her job.....he also got two different women pregnant during the relationship.....both of those kids are older than the two she has with him.....he has full custody of one since she was 2yrs so she is raising her......she says for like a year he left her to be with some random chick...and the sad thing about it is he moved literally around the corner dog......

now y'all know I've asked why and the hell is she with him.....she says she has dated and actually loved other men but it doesn't last....because she becomes so jealous and insecure the relationships always end.....she says the whole year he was gone she missed his ass like crazy but she did not call him not once....and he came back one day and she let him back no questions asked.....he proposed and they have been married three years now.....and she says she still cant trust him...she doesn't have any proof he is cheating but she knows him well enough.....so she is in this marriage that appears happy but in the inside she feels so insecure.....i could not imagine being in something like that....i never like to tell anyone to leave because i know its easier said then done.....but she deserves to be happy when your man touches you...your supposed to fell like that touch is yours...

i tell her about my relationship and all the mess i put up with and deal with....and she tells me to take it day by day.....but sometimes just think about her situation makes me want to get out this mess before i be in her shoes......i wonder why do we accept so much from men....he got two women pregnant on her and he left her for a year and moved around the damn corner....I'm sure he has done other shit.....like why do we give so many chances? i hope and pray that if this relationship is meant to stand the test of time....that i do not end being the insecure woman forcing myself to make a marriage work that was over 15 years ago.....smh.

if you're reading this please comment i would love to know.....your thoughts on why you think we stay in relationships that are unhealthy.....and if you are one of those women that leave the first time and never look back...i wanna know how you were able to do it?